Living with our expression of BDSM bears no resemblance to the standard porn that one reads or sees. Little moments of being a sub are sprinkled through my day. From asking permission to remove the house collar before I leave for work, to protocols for how I address him in public, how we walk together, and asking to replace the house collar when I get home, I am always aware. I like that it is not only in the bedroom.
I watched a pirated copy of “50 Shades…” and, even before Sir and I had this lifestyle shift, I thought, That seems improbable. I knew, through my own decades-long interest in the subject, and the experiences of friends, that it was not an accurate portrayal. As a fantasy? Sure, whatever gets one off.
Life is not all stalkery bajillionaires and red rooms of listlessly whapping at someone’s butt with an expensive, leather paddle, all while claiming that “This is the worst of what I’ll do to you.” Still, it did open up the conversation for a lot of people. That is a good thing.
I like how we live our BDSM. I expect that it will grow and change with time–as any intimate relationship should.